Dealing With A Lack of Libido


By: Marlene Affeld ~

Our libido, also known as our sex drive, begins around the time of the onset of puberty. For a diverse array of reasons, the human sex drive or libido can begin to decline. As we age, a decline of libido is inevitable. The body’s production of sex drive-fueling hormones begins to slow; men start developing more estrogen while begin to produce more testosterone. A major decline for women is menopause, when the libido takes a dramatic drop. Men, on the other hand, have a propensity to suffer from erectile dysfunction as they age.

Many Medications Diminish Sexual Desire

drug-943759_640Medications may be the cause of your lack of a sex drive. Lowered libido is a liability of many antidepressants; reduced sexual desire is a common side of Prozac, Zoloft and Celexa, often recommended to treat depression. Propecia, used to treat hair loss in men, is many times the culprit; you may not lose your hair, but you lose your sex drive. The libido lowering effects of Propecia can last long after you stop taking the drug. Rogaine is an alternative hair-loss treatment without sexual side effects.

Oral contraceptives, although designed to provide more sexual freedom, may prove counterintuitive to an active sex drive by reducing usable testosterone levels in women with these side effects continuing for up to a year or more after getting off birth control.

For women whose libido is adversely affected by birth control pills, non-hormonal contraceptives such as condoms, diaphragms or an IUD are good alternatives. Discuss the issue with experts from places like The Center for Cosmetic & Reconstructive Gynecology to find the birth control method that is right for you.

Is Your Libido Lethargic? – Lose Some Weight!

belly-2354_640Are you out of shape and overweight? Do you know there is a direct correlation between exercise and sex? The more physical exercise you do, the more powerful the libido. Additional benefits of exercise on your sex life are the ability to maintain sexual positions longer with more flexibility and endurance, improved self-esteem and more confidence.

Is Your Sex Life Bland and Boring?

No matter whether the decline is a result of stress, the use of drugs, the side effects of medications, excess weight, age, fluctuating hormones, or disease the decline in desire can wreck havoc in a relationship, diminish self-esteem, and sabotage the passion and intimacy inherent in a supportive, loving relationship.

In a marriage or a long-term relationship, intimacy is often relegated to the last thing before bedtime, another chore to check off the list. Sexual intercourse becomes predictable, routine and boring. When viewed in this light, it is no wonder if neither you or your partner are really in the mood for romance and the passion in your relationship goes from sizzling to stagnant.

Sweet Words and Affirmations

Spice up your love life by being experimental with your sexual practices. Boredom can derail your sex drive. Try a few new twists such as having sex in remote locations or introducing sex toys to the bedroom. Novelty can create arousal and introduce an element of interest that you and your partner may have been missing.

Make you relationship and your partner a priority by taking time to set the scene. Talk, share a meal, do whatever works for you as a couple to spend intimate time together prior to lovemaking. Shut off your cell phone, turn off the “mind chatter” that is running through your head with problems at work or other stresses, forget the television and computer; take time to unwind and relax. Make sure your partner feel that he or she is the sole focus of your attention.

Stress and Sex

Women and men respond differently to stressful situations. For many men, sex acts as a release of stressful energy. However, for women, stress can make sex the last thing on their mind. It is important to understand that men and women have different reactions to stress and sexual stimuli. Talk to your partner about arranging the right, non-stressful time to engage in sexual intimacy.

Participate in some relaxation exercises. If you feel your lack of a sex drive is attributable to stress, participate in calming activities to reduce it such as Tai Chi, yoga, Pilates, or meditative breathing. Recent medical research studies indicate that women that exercise and do strength training before participating in sex, experience a significant increase in libido. Focus on your partner and the pleasure of the moment.

Talk To Your Doctor

Medications to enhance your libido are available. For men, Viagra, Levitra or other similar medications may be an option. In women, declining estrogen levels can cause a lack of lubrication and painful sex. Women can improve the sexual experience with the application of vaginal estrogen based moisturizers. Tribolone, a synthetic steroid used to mimic other hormones, may be prescribed to stimulate the libido.


2 thoughts on “Dealing With A Lack of Libido

  1. Correction: You said that Viagra and other ED medications may be an option for men with low libido, but this is not quite true. ED drugs only help enhance penile blood flow and maintain an erection AFTER sexual arousal. They have no direct effect on sex drive, which is more affected by hormones.

    Men with low libido can also consider herbal supplements, and despite not being as effective as prescription drugs, they might produce considerable results for some men.

    There are certain herbs that have been traditionally used as an aphrodisiac and can be found in many sexual enhancement supplements; like Damiana, Catuaba, Epimedium and Muira Puama.


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